Transferred: Abner

I could start this post off with a touching picture of what it would look like to have Abner in your family, or what his life would have looked like if he were born into a family in the U.S. but though I may have time for that...Abner doesn't.  Abner is 5, and today we were told that he has been transferred to a mental institution.  

This means that Abner is running out of time.  Every day that passes is another day where he will become more malnourished, and his needs will not be met.  Abner, needs out, and he needs out now.  He has no more time, he has run out, and a mental institution is not where a baby belongs.  

You may not be in the position to adopt Abner, you may not be able to financially give, but sharing Abner, sharing his need, his picture, cost nothing.  Abner's life is priceless, and he deserves much more than he has been given. 

http://reecesrainbow.org/36175/abner

I Am An Orphan Advocate

I am an orphan advocate.

I've said that sentence so many times, to people who are curious about my "hobbies" and want to know about "Alyssa". I tell them that I advocate, that I blog, all for children who have no hope, children that I love immensely. The response I normally get is somewhere along the lines of "Oh how cool!" and that's typically where the conversation ends.  Every time, after one of those short conversations, I'm left feeling sad because to me advocacy is so much more than just "cool".

I mean, I don't expect someone to have input on advocacy when they nothing about it, but I do wish people would ask more questions.  To me advocacy is currently my life.  I spend all of my time fundraising, sharing, blogging, donating, brainstorming, and praying over these kids.  I strive daily to know more about the orphanages, the living conditions, the needs, the outlets that I can use to help the urgent situations.

I started when I was 13 and I have been dedicated ever since.  My best friend Kaitlyn, and I have raised thousands of dollars for adopting families, and waiting children over the past 5 years.  We have gained no money, no publicity, no "higher rank", we have done this purely for the children and their families.  We fight, daily for these lives, because they matter and we see their potential.

Advocacy isn't easy, you can ask any advocate.  It's hard because sometimes you fight tirelessly for a child and they wait year, after year and sometimes their family never comes.  It's heartbreaking, and tiresome, to fight for a child and then to see them age out... Advocacy is not for the faint of heart.  Being an advocate means having your heart broken, picking up the pieces, and loving the next child.

There are joyful moments too.  Those joyful moments, when your child has a family, or when you get updated pictures and know your kiddo is doing 'alright', or when your kiddo finally makes it home after months of praying their family through the adoption process.  Those joyful moments make all of it worth it.  Because, you see, watching a child go from malnourished and broken, to restored, chosen and LOVED does something extraordinary to your heart, and makes you want to do it all over again.

Being an orphan/adoption advocate changes you.  It gives you a different perspective on life, and is a constant reminder of just how lucky we all are.  I know that for me, I am always cautious of the best way to use my money.   "Do I need this $12 shirt? No, this money can go to a child/family/urgent need."  I have literally had that conversation with my self hundreds of times, and I'm thankful for the heart, and mindset that God has blessed me with.

Advocacy has changed me, and I am grateful for that.  I am a proud orphan advocate, and I wish everyone could experience having a love, so strong for a child that you have never met, never held, never spoken too, never kissed, or loved on, but yet you fight, every day, for that life.  Because these children, they matter.

The Pleven Project

So, I've given myself the task of raising as much money as I can for The Pleven Project. For those of you that don't know Pleven is an orphanage in Bulgaria that houses 92 children. The living conditions are outrageous, and many of the children are extremely malnourished. Keith U. came out of Pleven at 5 years old weighing 10 pounds. He spent most of his time in an isolation room for no valid reason, he was also tied to his crib which left marks on his wrists. Keith is just one of the many children that have been forever damaged by that wretched place.

Recently a group of wonderful ladies devised a plan and jumped into action to better the lives in the Pleven Orphanage. They have provided funds to hire Leyla's (Grandmothers, or Nanies) that are each assigned a child, and get to spend one-on-one time with the kids. Which is absolutely wonderful, and they have already seen and heard that the kids have benefited from this tremendously! The next project that the Pleven Project team is wanting to fund is a Day Home this will benefit Pleven Orphanage, and Pleven's Community. This day home will serve as a Day Care for families who would like to continue to care for, and parent their children with special needs, and it will serve as a benefit to Pleven allowing the kids to have access to more Therapies such as Music, Art, Physical, ect.

The Pleven Project team really wants to empower families, and equip them to care for their children with special needs in their own homes, so that they don't have to give their children up. This will be so beneficial in many ways, to multiple families, and children. There's a little bump in building this Day Home, and that is that it is going to cost $100,000 to buy the materials, and build it. As I said above, this Day Home will be extremely beneficial, and is really needed at Pleven. 

Alone, we can't raise that $100,000 and that is just a fact, but with the help of generous hearts we can raise that $100,000. This money could be raised in a week if Pleven's need went viral, and hearts were moved, or it could take months or even a year, but that all depends on whether you are willing to share the need, and possibly donate too. So, if you are even just willing to share the need, and pray God's blessing over it, that would be amazing in it's self. But if you can donate $5, $10, $30, to this project, and help better the lives of families in Pleven, Bulgaria that would be a blessing too. 

Like I said, this all depends on generous hearts, who are willing to help in any way. If you decide to donate, in the notes section please specify that you would like your donation to go to the Day Home so that the team knows to set it aside. I'm extremely grateful for every single person who will pray over this project, and the children in Pleven, for those who will share in hopes to gain more awareness, and those who choose to donate and make this possible.  I will have a Youcaring set up soon so that we can track our progress, and others can donate if they feel inclined (Thank you Shelley!!), but right now if you would like to donate you can donate directly to The Pleven Project, just add a note with your donation that says "Day Center" :) 

This is intimidating I'm not gonna lie, especially with it being Angel Tree season and needing $1000 for Charlie, I'm taking on a lot. This money could be raised in a week or a month, or it could take 6 months or a year, it all depends on the number of hearts that are moved into action,  but God sees the desires of my heart, and I know He will provide the $100,000 in one way or another...God's got my back, and my faith is in Him.

Angel Tree Musings

This is my favorite time of year, when the weather gets cold, and leaves start to change colors.  Fall/Winter months are the best, in my opinion, because they're filled with family activities, Holidays, the celebration of Jesus' birth, it's just a beautiful time of year!  Not to mention that every advocate looks forward to these months because Angel Tree is such a fun fundraising experience, and it's amazing to watch advocates join together to shout, and plead for the waiting children who have stolen our hearts.

So far I have raise $141.77 for Charlie, and seeing how we're only 8 days into Angel Tree I'd say I'm doing good.  It's times like these when I really learn to lean on God, and trust Him because Lord knows I can't raise $1000 on my own!  So, I am most definitely excited to see what God has in-store for the coming days of Angel tree. :)

Today I received my 2014 Angel Tree Ornament with Charlie's picture on it, and I swear he just gets cuter!  I was ecstatic to hang it on my little mini Christmas Tree that is up in my room (Yes, I've already started decorating for Christmas!).  I actually purchased two of Charlie's ornaments, I plan to send the second one to his future mama, and papa for them to have as a treasure.

Charlie, turns two in December and I want to do something special.  I want to celebrate him, and his second birthday, but I also want to include his future family in some way.  I've thought about maybe writing a letter to his future family, or maybe having a small celebration of Charlie, and capturing the whole thing through pictures, I'm still undecided, but I think it would mean bunches to his future mama, and papa.

I'm excited for Angel Tree, I'm excited for Thanksgiving, I'm thankful for Charlie, and I'm thankful for every single person who takes the time to read through my blog posts. :)

I will be sharing some new fundraisers for Pleven soon, so pleae be sure to check back!

Want to help Charlie reach his Angel Tree goal?  Click through to this link: http://reecesrainbow.org/81243/charlie-2

Little Bits Made Big

With November 1st quickly approaching (1 day, 3 hours, and 38 minutes till Angel Tree Launch!!) and the excitement of Angel Tree arising I'm wrapping up my major fundraising for Pleven.  I want to be able to focus my efforts on my baby boy Charlie, as I committed to him first!  I am still doing small projects on the side for Pleven, to keep the need fresh in peoples minds, but I will be mainly focusing on Charlie Roo.  I recently asked my Facebook friends if they would be willing to collect change for Pleven with me, and many of them jumped right in and have began collecting their spare change for Pleven!

Kara H. and her beautiful family have this sweet jar collecting their spare change! :) 

I have a jar sitting on my desk that is about 1/4 of the way full with spare change, and my family has joined in on the fun too!  I have to say that I am thankful for willing, and generous hearts who want to help in the small ways.  I actually came across a Facebook post that fits these small actions perfectly.

"If you keep your "little", it will remain little.  But if you step into the exchange zone ready to offer what little you have to be used by God in moving the baton forward, your little will be multiplied as you run." 
-Christine Caine 

I can't even begin to express how true that is!  We often think that what we have to offer isn't enough, or is "too small", but God reminds us that no matter how big or small He can take it and make it into something miraculous!  So yes, even collecting a jar of loose change is benefiting the lives in Pleven and is getting us closer to our goal of $100,000! YOU are making a difference, and I think that is AMAZING!  If you would like to join us, grab a jar, can, container, box, anything really, and collect your loose change until it's full!

Another wonderful praise that I want to share with you is, the outcome of the t-shirt fundraiser! (Which is still up and running until November 1st, so be sure to grab your tee here: http://teespring.com/Pleven)  I jumped on TeeSpring today to check on the fundraiser, and see the total amount raised at this point, and was pleasantly surprised to see that *we* have raised $102 for Pleven!!  Yes, 12 T-shirts sold, and $102 raised!  I am so grateful for every single person who has bought a T-shirt, for every single person who has shared this fundraiser, for every single person who has prayed over Pleven, this fundraiser, and the hands that would help us reach this goal! I AM GRATEFUL.

I subtracted the $102 from the $100,000 and the new total that came about is $99,898!  WE are making progress, it may be tiny progress but we're closer than when we started!  Seeing that total drop brings me JOY, so much joy!  Please, know that I am thanking God for each of you!  I could not do this on my own!

If you are wanting to help raise this $99,898 but aren't sure how, please! Email me! or Facebook message me!  I would be so happy to hear from you, and share with you the different ways that YOU can benefit the lives in Pleven!

My email is linked on the right hand side bar of the blog, but I'll list it here too.
AlyssaGoodhue@hotmail.com

Again, I am thankful for every.single.one.of.you.  Whether you've been following my blog for years, or whether this is your first time reading.  You are the reason that I could ever even imagine raising $100,000.  You are all blessings!

The Pleven Project

So, I've given myself the task of raising as much money as I can for The Pleven Project. For those of you that don't know Pleven is an orphanage in Bulgaria that houses 92 children. The living conditions are outrageous, and many of the children are extremely malnourished. Keith U. came out of Pleven at 5 years old weighing 10 pounds. He spent most of his time in an isolation room for no valid reason, he was also tied to his crib which left marks on his wrists. Keith is just one of the many children that have been forever damaged by that wretched place.

Recently a group of wonderful ladies devised a plan and jumped into action to better the lives in the Pleven Orphanage. They have provided funds to hire Leyla's (Grandmothers, or Nanies) that are each assigned a child, and get to spend one-on-one time with the kids. Which is absolutely wonderful, and they have already seen and heard that the kids have benefited from this tremendously! The next project that the Pleven Project team is wanting to fund is a Day Home this will benefit Pleven Orphanage, and Pleven's Community. This day home will serve as a Day Care for families who would like to continue to care for, and parent their children with special needs, and it will serve as a benefit to Pleven allowing the kids to have access to more Therapies such as Music, Art, Physical, ect.

The Pleven Project team really wants to empower families, and equip them to care for their children with special needs in their own homes, so that they don't have to give their children up. This will be so beneficial in many ways, to multiple families, and children. There's a little bump in building this Day Home, and that is that it is going to cost $100,000 to buy the materials, and build it. As I said above, this Day Home will be extremely beneficial, and is really needed at Pleven. 

Alone, we can't raise that $100,000 and that is just a fact, but with the help of generous hearts we can raise that $100,000. This money could be raised in a week if Pleven's need went viral, and hearts were moved, or it could take months or even a year, but that all depends on whether you are willing to share the need, and possibly donate too. So, if you are even just willing to share the need, and pray God's blessing over it, that would be amazing in it's self. But if you can donate $5, $10, $30, to this project, and help better the lives of families in Pleven, Bulgaria that would be a blessing too. 

Like I said, this all depends on generous hearts, who are willing to help in any way. If you decide to donate, in the notes section please specify that you would like your donation to go to the Day Home so that the team knows to set it aside. I'm extremely grateful for every single person who will pray over this project, and the children in Pleven, for those who will share in hopes to gain more awareness, and those who choose to donate and make this possible.  I will have a Youcaring set up soon so that we can track our progress, and others can donate if they feel inclined (Thank you Shelley!!), and right now I have set up a T-shirt fundraiser that will benefit The Pleven Project.  For $21 you can purchase a t-shirt that states "I will not let their story end like this." with an outline of Bulgaria in the background: http://teespring.com/Pleven

This is a small way that you can help change the fate of these children, and it will help reduce the amount needed to build that day home.  This is intimidating I'm not gonna lie, especially with it being Angel Tree season and needing $1000 for Charlie, I'm taking on a lot. This money could be raised in a week or a month, or it could take 6 months or a year, it all depends on the number of hearts that are moved into action,  but God sees the desires of my heart, and I know He will provide the $100,000 in one way or another...God's got my back, and my faith is in Him.


Will you consider buying a shirt in honor of the 92 orphans in Pleven?

The Love That's Shared

I may or may not be crying as I'm typing, but I honestly can't help it.  so.much.love. has been shown to my kiddos these past few days!  Both of their funds have grown by generous amounts, and that bring such joy to my heart.  I love, love, love, these two so much and when I see others sharing their pictures, profiles, and donating it's a happy sight.  I know these two are so close to having families, I can just feel it and I'm so ready to help FIGHT to get both of them HOME.

Roo, Sunshine Girl?

  You two have completely stolen my heart, I'm head-over-heels captivated by both of you.  You deserve so much, and I promise to get both of you everything you deserve, I'll give up anything to see you in the arms of a family, being loved, cherished, and chosen.

Dear Sunshine Girl

Hey there Sunshine Girl,

  I can't get you off my mind, and you surely have made an imprint on my heart.  You're situation is so urgent, and all I can wonder is what you condition is like today, this very moment.  The photos I have of you are from 2012, two and a half years ago.  I'm sure so much has changed, and you're health could have changed drastically, what if your Hydrocephalus isn't being treated?  What if you were given a shunt, and it failed? Or got infected?  What if you're sick, and in the hospital again?  Alone, without a mama to cuddle you, and be there when you're scared.  Oh sunshine girl, my mama heart breaks for you, over, and over again.

I promise Sunshine, I promise I'm doing all I can to find your mama and papa, I promise you'll go home soon.  Tomorrow I'm printing your pictures, and they will hang above my desk right next to Charlie's picture.  You two have my heart, every last piece of it and I wont stop fighting until both of you are HOME, with a mama, and a papa, and a bed to call your very own.  Please, Sunshine Girl, don't stop fighting, hold on a little longer just for me so I can find your mama and tell her to come get you!  You can do it, I know you can!


Oh Sunshine Girl,
  how I love you so...

Aria's Angels

I may or may not be insane, but I can't not advocate for this little girl.   From the moment she was listed (literally the moment) till the late night when I found her in a database, I've been smitten.  Meet Aria, my sweet girl!  Miss Aria is 6 years old, and was born with Spina bifida, Hydrocephalus, cerebral palsy, deep mental delay, congenital deformity of the hip, congenital ptosis, optic nerve atrophy, iron and protein deficiency. Her Reece's Rainbow profile also states that she has spent a lot of time in the hospital, which just broke my heart into millions of tiny pieces.  Yes, that is quite the list but I promise you her sweet face (that I cried over for a good 30 minutes) will steal your heart away.

When I found her database photos from early 2012 my heart sank to my stomach, *how* could this be sweet Aria?  How could this gorgeous girl be living like this?  I just couldn't quite wrap my mind around it.  I messaged my best friend Kaitlyn with Aria's pictures, and just told Kaitlyn, over, and over, and over, "She needs to be seen, she needs out!  Oh Kaitlyn, I need help, we need to find her family!"  So, I began brainstorming trying to figure out what I could do to potentially find her family, and help raise her grant fund.  After many failed ideas I came up with Aria's Angels.  Aria's Angels is a project I've created to raise awareness for Aria, and raise her grant fund.  The first 5 people to donate $10 to Aria's grant (Found here: http://reecesrainbow.org/82060/aria), and forward/email their receipt to me (AlyssaGoodhue@hotmail.com)  will become a part of Aria's Angels, and I will mail you a necklace like the one below, for you to wear in honor of Aria.  Once a month you will have a chance to join Aria's Angels, and help find her family! (I chose once a month because necklace making supplies are pricey, and I'm also focusing on my Angel Tree boy Charlie.)

I need all the warriors I can get, because by myself I wont be able to save Aria, it takes a village. So, who wants to be the first to play a part in Aria's Angels? :)

Remembering Addison Ruth

It still remember it like it was yesterday, I remember the details, I remember reliving the same exact day for 2 months.  

3 years ago my dad came quietly into my room, with his hand on my shoulder he lightly shook me to wake me up, as I opened my eyes he said "Hey Lyssie, we think we lost the baby."  and I...I couldn't speak, or think and all I could manage to say was "no, no, no, no, no..." 

I remember getting out of bed in shock, still not knowing how to comprehend what I'd just been told.  I remember telling my mom I would go to the hospital with her for an ultrasound to be sure that we lost the baby.  I put on my light brown jacket, pulled my hair back, and we left.  The 5 minute drive to the hospital, seemed like an hour with the deafening silence that filled the truck.  We got their and they took us back, we waited in a room for the ultrasound tech, and I continued to pray over, and over, and over "Oh God, please breathe life back into this baby, please God please, I'll do anything, just please give me this." I can't even begin to count the amount of times that I prayed that prayer over the course of those three days.  

The ultrasound tech entered the room, smeared the ultrasound cream on her belly, and placed the wand on her stomach.  He looked, and looked, and looked, and he then began to type, "No Fetal Heartbeat" on the screen, and we lost it.  I couldn't breathe, no matter how hard I tried to gasp for air, my chest tightened, and the physical pain that took over my body was enough to paralyze.  I laid there by my moms feet, and just cried into the hospital bed, "why God, why, I don't understand, why.  this is all I've wanted, a little sister, and you took her from me, why God why" 

I remember our lovely midwife coming to the hospital to sit with my mom, while I went home to watch the kids so my dad could go to the hospital.  I remember walking through the maze of hallways leaving the Labor & Delivery Ward, I remember the walls spinning, and the tears falling. 

When I got home, the little ones were distracted by the video game, so I sat in our office and listened to praise and worship music, I prayed, and tried to hold in the tears for fear of upsetting the kids.  I remember a few of our friends coming over to play with the little ones, as it was too overwhelming for us to chase them.  I remember person, after person bringing food, and cards, and flowers, and offering to watch the little ones.  I remember wanting to be thankful for their kind generous hearts, and their willingness to lend a hand in this treacherous time, but I also remember wishing I could just be alone to cry, I didn't want to be hugged, or touched, I wanted to cry, and scream because I was so angry.  

I remember trying to reply to a text from my dad when the little ones began fighting, so I put down my phone and tried to figure out what the problem was, but in the moment of asking them to 'please stop fighting' I lost it, tears filled my eyes, and I had to leave the room I had no energy to deal with anything, and I didn't know how to help them cope with this big situation, in a way that they would understand.

I remember my dad texting me late that night to say "Addison is here, and she's cute too."  I remember collapsing into my brothers arms, and just crying, because this isn't how it was supposed to be, this isn't how I wanted it to be, and I had no control over anything.   

I remember going to the hospital the next day to see her, I remember holding her lifeless body, and just praying over, and over, that God would breathe life back into her, I begged, and pleaded with Him, please just let me have her.  I sat, and I cried, I looked at her sweet face, her full head of hair, as I cradled her in my arms and stroked her sweet face.  

I remember when it was time to go home, I remember laying Addison in a bassinet that had been all decorated in pinks, and purples, specially for her.  I remember the nurse letting us go out the back door of the hospital so that we didn't have to walk through the crowds of people.  I remember walking through the parking lot with an unbearable amount of pain in my chest because there was nothing in me that wanted to leave Addison there, and my heart broke knowing that I would never be able to hold her again. (And some days that all I want, just one more minute to cradle her, to remember what it felt like to hold her.) 

I remember later that week when we had her funeral.  I don't remember what the pastor said, I was far to emotionally exhausted, and this was never something I thought I would have to do. But I do remember wishing that people would stop hugging me, which sounds so selfish but if you've lost a loved one I'm sure you understand.  I was irritated, and upset, exhausted, and angry, I wanted to go and be alone, I wanted to sleep because that was the only time I didn't feel any pain. 

I remember reliving the same 3 days for months, I remember sinking into this never ending whole that consumed every part of me. 

I remember it all.  I haven't forgotten any of the details.  The pain is still very, very, present...but as time goes on you learn how to numb it.  The tears still fall, and some days it's still really unbearable.  But God is good, all the time. He knows, and I trust that His plans far exceed my own.  

I miss my little sister immensely, and I wonder what would have been, but I know God had different plans for her life, and I'm slowly becoming 'okay' with that. 

| But as for me, I will always have hope; I will praise you more, and more.| 

Psalm 71:14

Charlie Roo's

Okay, so I am finally gearing up for Angel Tree.  Since I've signed up to be Charlie's warrior I have, opened a little shop called Charlie Roo's, created multiple necklaces, been to Hobby Lobby an unhealthy amount of times, burnt myself countless times with a hot glue gun, become obsessed with making hair bows, and spent too much time on Pinterest...which by the way Pinterest's App wasn't working this morning and I had a mini heart-attack.  After everything I've done this past week I think I am finally ready for Angel Tree to start!

I'm still so in love with little Roo, and am excited to share his face everywhere in hopes of finding his mama, and papa that he so deserves!  If you're reading this and are just as in love with Charlie as I am, and are wanting to know more about the adoption process please, oh please, email me! AlyssaGoodhue@hotmail.com I would be more than happy to answer any questions, and point you in the right direction. :)  

If you want you can also click through the link below and "Like" Charlie Roo's on Facebook!  It would mean so, so, much. Let's get this baby boy HOME. 

Charlie Roo's Facebook Page

Angel Tree, Angel Tree, ANGEL TREE!!!

Yes, it is that time again...Angel Tree time!!  I love, love, love this time of the year and was a little worried that I wouldn't know which child to choose.   In my confusion of not knowing which child was "my" child, I sat for a little bit and prayed, I told God to bless me with the little one that needed me most, and He did just that.  I was so eager to sign up, and be this little one's warrior that this morning, when I woke up and saw that the sign ups were open early, I nearly fell off my bed trying to grab my laptop... Yes, I am that excited, and READY for Angel Tree!  I've waited all day, eagerly checking my email to see if I was indeed this little ones warrior, the anticipation  was really making me go nuts, so you can only imagine the joy that filled my heart when I saw that I was officially Charlie's Angel Tree Warrior!!  I would love for you to meet "my" cutie:

Charlie's Reece's Rainbow Profile: http://reecesrainbow.org/81243/charlie-2

I am head over-heels, so in love, constantly swooning, over this baby boy, and am SO ecstatic to be his warrior this Christmas season!  Sweet Charlie will be 2 years old in December, he was born with Down syndrome, and is clearly adorable!  I am working on some fundraisers to kick off the Angel Tree project, there will be more blog posts about those fundraisers as they finish and become ready for the public eye. :) 

I really, really, hope that you will consider following my blog to be updated on fundraisers, Charlie's cuteness, and out progress during Angel Tree!  I love my followers, and I love it when I can make an impact in other lives, so please consider joining us this holiday season as Myself, and little Charlie raise $1000 towards the cost of his adoption (Because without Charlie's adorable face, I wouldn't raise any money.). 

Still I will Praise

Photo Cred: Pinterest

This hit me hard tonight. For one reason, in September it will have been three years since my little sister, Addison Ruth, passed away.  Three days before she would hopefully make her appearance in this world, God decided it was time for her to come home, she had already pleased God with her life of 9 months, and her time here was finished.  When we lost Addison we relived the same days for months, we sank into this never ending black whole, and oh the pain was, and some days still is torturous.  We clung to God, knowing that He is the only one that could carry us through such a time, that never seemed to end.

But you see we had a choice to make, and it was not an easy choice, would we choose to praise Him in that time?  Regardless of the fact that most days we didn't have the energy to get out of bed, we didn't want to see people, or deal with the bantering of the exhausted, confused, sad, little ones that still needed to be tended too, eating was out of the question, and well the tears they never stopped, regardless of our tiredness, sadness, anger, and exhaustion, would we choose to praise Him even when He takes away?

Did we want to?  Well I'll speak for myself and say that no, I didn't.  I was angry, furious even, I felt like God had teased me.  He gave me the little sister that I had asked for, for so long, and then had taken her from me, before I was able to truly enjoy her, I felt cheated.  I didn't sign up for this, why me, it wasn't fair.  So, why would I praise Him in that time, it was almost like I was trying to punish God.

As the days got worse, I knew in the back of my mind that turning away from God, and choosing not to worship Him, and not trusting that He is all knowing, all powerful, and all mighty was only going to hurt me, and damage me even further than I was already.  So, I turned to God and I told Him I was angry with Him, that I didn't understand, and I was not okay with what was happening, but that I would praise Him anyways because He is the God who gives, and takes away all for a purpose and bigger picture that I cannot see.   I clung to Him for dear life, because I was sure that I would not make it through loosing Addison, I was sure that my heart would never heal, I was sure that there was "no purpose" for this, I was sure.

But here I am, three years later about to celebrate Addison's 9 months of life, and I can look back and see where praising God even when He takes away had benefited me.  Addion's 9 months of life, and God calling her home, have allowed me to share, and witness to other young women who have had a sibling be still born.  I have now been able to be a crutch, a listening ear, a soft heart, and open hand to families, and young women who have suffered the same loss as I have.  Addison's life, changed my life, and God used her to strengthen my walk, trust, and hope in Him.

Choosing to praise Him even when He takes away is one of the hardest things that I have ever had to do, but it is so worth it in the long run.

So now I have a question for you, will you choose to praise Him even when He takes away?

Really Picture It

Last November while I was with the Unroe family on their "Gotcha-Trip", Mrs.Unroe had shown me a little boy on Reece's Rainbow who was waiting for a family, his name was "Robert".  An 11 year old boy, who was born with Down syndrome, and he happened to be located in a country that is really close to my heart. Well today, close to a year later his little face popped in my head, and I wondered if he was still waiting for his family to find him, and much to my surprise he still is.  When I found him still listed on Reece's Rainbow, my heart broke a little and I longed to reach through the screen and hold him.   He'll be 12 this year, yes 12 years old though he is about the size of a 4 year old, in December he will have been waiting twelve years to feel anything other than rejection, being unwanted, unloved, always lost in the shuffle, he waits for a hope to come along.

I want to be Robert's hope, I feel like the worst advocate for waiting almost a year to realize that no one is shouting for him, he has no one.  But I, I am someone and I have the power to find his family.  I always manage to fall in love with little boys, and they are typically "older", but I feel like those kids are the most over looked.  Most families want a cute baby, or maybe a little girl with blonde hair and blue eyes, not everyone, but most families.  But this darling, Robert? Is a sweet brown eyed, boy who has all the potential in the world, imagine what his smile is like, I bet he lights up a room, and I'm sure he has the most irresistible giggle.  I remember when we picked up the three newest Unroe's from their orphanage, I remember Jonathan's reaction to seeing birds, and being able to walk around his country that he'd lived in for years but was never able to experience.   I remember Jonathan singing, and singing, and singing, oh and he loved to whistle too, and when I think of Robert I picture that he'll be just as excited to finally have a chance, outside of an orphanage, and inside of a family.

Can you picture Robert as your son?  I mean really picture it, first trip of visits, getting to know him, nurturing his broken heart, and rebuilding him into the person God created him to be, longing to hold him while you wait for court dates, and final trips, travelling for Gotcha-Day, and finally walking away from his orphanage with him in your arms forever, can you see it?

Robert needs you, he needs me.  He has little hope, and I would really hate to see him wait much longer, I will be your biggest fan, advocate, fundraiser, I'd even travel on gotcha trip if you needed me, I would climb mountains for this child, I really would.  Please, don't let fear stop you, because I can assure you that Robert is worth more than everything that comes with an international adoption, I promise you he is.

Robert's Profile: http://reecesrainbow.org/50708/robert

What's Wrong With Me

I've come to the realization that insecurity will be the death of every female, regardless of age, insecurity is what will single-handedly destroy them.  Why do I say this with such certainty?  Because my heart aches as I watch the 15 year old share her 'daily make-up routine' with her Youtube followers,  with every product she picks up the ache grows a little more each time.  She's 15, and she feels the need to use several different products to try and hide the blemishes that make her...her.  The freckles that make her unique, the natural hue in her perfectly beautiful skin.  She doesn't see beauty in who she is.

Or maybe I say this so confidently because recently I was told that foundation just helps my skin look...better.  Is this what our world has come to? Finding material things to make us look "better"?  I know it has, but to watch these girls be completely destroyed, without them even realizing what's happened until it's too late, and they can't find beauty or worth in who they are because this world has stripped them of every good thing, and told them that they are not enough...That is hard to watch.  

The subject of self-image, and self-love has been on my mind a lot recently.  I struggle with self-worth, and truly believing that I am indeed beautiful too, I'm only human it's expected.  There are days when I don't feel like leaving my house because I know my self-confidence will be shot down the second I see another girl who happens to fit societies version of beautiful better than I do. With her long hair, perfectly done make-up, and "all the right clothes", that is when I don't feel like enough, because I don't meet societies standards.  On those days I find myself overwhelmed, so overwhelmed to the point where I shut down, I don't want to do anything but sit and sift through this ongoing list in my head of what is wrong with *me*. 

Now, most people don't know about my self-image issues, so please be gracious with the fact that I am being transparent and vulnerable with you.  I'm sharing my brokenness, and flaws with you in hopes that it may be comforting to another hurting girl who feels like she isn't enough... because most days I don't feel like enough.  

I want to let you in on a little secret:  You...are more than enough.  Flaws and all.  

Yes, I am telling you that society is wrong.  Yes, I'm telling you that those products?  The ones that the marketing companies promise will "enhance your beauty"? Are indeed, just hiding the face that is perfect to begin with  Yes, I'm telling you that using those products doesn't enhance your beauty, they just hide it.  

I've never been one to wear foundations, or concealers, because I've promised myself that on those days when I feel that I am not pretty enough, that I will not ruin the canvas that God has already painted perfectly.  I may not see it at the moment, but I will never see it if I am constantly covering it up, trying to hide, or change the things that I a human who has no true vision of beauty, don't like.  We will never have a true vision of beauty unless we see beauty in the things that God sees as beautiful.  Our current vision of beauty is shaped by what?  Yes, society, and what society considers "beautiful".  

I'm not saying make-up is a horrible thing, but I am saying that we use it as a crutch, we depend on it for beauty.  But fake isn't beautiful.  Flaws are beautiful, they make us unique, one of a kind.  We, you, I are all beautifully made, hand crafted by a God who doesn't make ugly, who doesn't make worthless, who doesn't make less than enough.  Though we have no choice but to live in a broken society, we always have the choice to shoot down the opinions and lies of this world, and embrace our beauty, confidence, WORTH, and love who we have been created to be.  

"Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself." -Coco Chanel 

Beauty Is Fake

You are enough.

Three words, that are more than true, but why do we have such a hard time believing them?  Why is it that the few hurtful words easily over power the handfuls of positive ones?  In our society today beauty is a lie.  The girls on the magazines are fake, and photo-shopped.  Girls, feel the need to wear pounds, and pounds of make-up in order to be beautiful, which ultimately hides their true beauty.   We wonder why girls are this way, we wonder why girls throw themselves as guys for attention, we wonder why girls can't *just be real*.  But you see, you're asking too much, you're asking for girls to be real in a world where "beauty" is fake, it's a lie, we give girls standards that are impossible to reach, unless you're a photo on a computer screen, that's been altered and shrunk. 

I think we've forgotten what beauty is.  What does it mean to be beautiful? Putting others first, being humble, not shouting for attention, being sweet, and kind, having class and realizing that what's in your heart is enough to attract a man, who is genuinely interested in who you are, and not what your body looks like.  Beauty is from within, when your heart is stunning, and beaming with love, gentleness, and kindness, when you try your best to see the best in others, you will be the most radiant, and beautiful girl.  

Everyone is beautiful.  It's as simple as that.  We are all unique, creative, silly, courageous, funny, daring, sweet, and different in our own ways.  Today's society pushes for everyone to be the same, for everyone to dress, and look the same.  Long hair, long legs, a skinny waist, and a flawless face are societies standards for beauty, but that is impossible for anyone to reach.  Their standards are outrageous, and too high.  They don't realize that they are destroying girls, they are taking their confidence and telling them that they aren't enough.  They are telling them they will never be beautiful, or amount to anything in this world.  But this beauty is a lie, it's not beauty, it's harsh, and ugly.  It's harmful, and destructive.  Beauty is what you want it to be, whether it's short hair or long hair, whether it's skirts and dresses, or jeans and ball caps, whether it's make-up or no make-up, whether it's cheer leading, or band. You are you, and that is more than enough.  Hold your head high, flash your stunning smile, and walk like you own the place, because you are your own kind of beautiful.

And you are enough. 

Bent Low

I’ve come to realize just how much of a “God thing” it was that I *stumbled* upon Reece’s Rainbow.  You see I was just 13 years old, I was new to blogging, and had originally gotten into blogging to make money using Google Adsense.  Never in a million years would I have imagined that I would have my eyes opened and heart shattered into pieces, a thousand times over, and over again, by a crisis such as the 147 million orphans that are currently in the world today. 

I was 13. I was young, immature, and could have easily turned away and focused on the “typical” likes, and dislikes of every other 13 year old girl…but I didn’t.  I ask myself “What would cause a 13 year old to focus solely on others? And special needs?  That’s not *normal* for a 13 year old.” And I could never figure out the “right” answer.  Until yesterday, as I was leaving Walmart.  I’m currently on vacation in Missouri, we stopped by Walmart to pick up a few things and as I was parading my little brothers out to the van,  I passed a mama, and her two little girls, one with Down syndrome.  It was in that moment when I looked at this sweet pea, as she giggled with her sister that God revealed the cause of my passion: Him.  He is the reason, and I know it seems simple but really think about it.  Yes, he gave me my passion, but why.  Why at 13 years old?  Why 5 years later am I still breaking my heart over these kids?  Why is this passion still here?

There is a quote that’s rather popular amongst those of us that are *obsessed* with missions trips, that says “God doesn’t call the equipped, he equips the called.”  We are all called to do something, and God teaches, allows, and gifts us exactly what we need for the passions that we are called to pursue.  For me he began equipping me at 13 years old, He began stretching the lengths of my love, while growing my knowledge of the orphan crisis.  I’m 18 now, and I still continue to learn more about the conditions, and brokenness of the orphan every.single.day.  I never stop learning, and my passion only grows bigger, and deeper.   I find myself wanting to do more than blog, I want to go, and do, I want to move and use my hands,  I want to push myself till I feel like I can’t do anymore, and then ask God to push me further.   Katie Davis’ book: Kisses From Katie, has one of my all time favorite quotes: 

“We bend.  I bend to sweep crumbs and I bend to wipe vomit and I bend to pick up little ones and wipe away tears… And at the end of these days I bend next to the bed and I ask only that I could bend more, bend lower.  Because I serve a Savior who came to be a servant.  He lived bent low.  And bent down here is where I see His face.  He lived, only to die. Could I? Die to self and just break open for love.  This Savior, His one purpose to spend Himself on behalf of messy us.  Will I spend myself on behalf of those in front of me? And people say “Don’t you get tired? And yes, I do.  But I’m face to face with Jesus in the dirt, and the more I bend the harder and better and fuller this life gets.  And sure we are tired, but oh we are happy.  Because bent down low is where we find fullness of joy.”

That quote describes the every want of my heart.  I want to live bent low, I want to go to the scary places, I want God to use me in ways I never thought possible, I want to go where love is needed.  

So yes, it was/is a total God thing that at the age of 13 years old I, uneducated, immature, and blind to the horribly dark corners of the world, stumble upon a photo-listing, and had my heart broken by faces that were locked away for being who they were made to be.    But it was no accident, and it was in fact all part of God's beautiful, and sometimes scary plan for my life.   Honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way.  I am in love with the unique passions that God has put in my heart, and I strive everyday to accomplish them so that I when the time comes I can hear God say “Well done, good and faithful servant.” 

With love,

Alyssa 

Thea

You may have noticed the new page up^ there, at the top of the blog, labeled "Letters".  I have decided to combine my advocacy blog, and personal blog, all of my advocacy, letters, updates, and personal thoughts, will be posted here on this blog!  I think it will be easier to not only keep up with, but I feel my readers will appreciate it more, because everything will be in one place! :)

The "Letters" tab will be updated frequently with letters to Layton, Thea, and Olivia, my three little lovies whom I advocate for.  I like to write them letters, to let them know I am thinking of them, and so that their future families will be able to see that I their child was loved before they found them. :)

So, "Thea"  interesting name for a post right?  Well Thea, happens to be the name of a sweet little girl, who I fell in love with.  She is living in an orphanage in Eastern Europe, and was born with special needs, she has sweet brown eyes, that twinkle, beautiful brown hair, and just the loveliest face.  Thea, only has around 6 months to find a family, and isn't able to receive donations because she will only be listed for a few months.

Thea, is my newest little babe and I am extremely excited to be advocating for her!  I can't get over how lovely she is, and cannot wait to see/"meet" the lucky family that will make her their daughter! :)

If you have any questions about Thea, please email me and I will put you in contact with the right people!

With Love,
Alyssa

Scrubs & Orphans

Recently I have been messing around with homemade sugar, and salt scrubs, and have been very pleased with the way they turned out!  With a little help from Pinterest, doTERRA Essential Oils, and wonderful Coconut oil,  I have created some fabulous scrubs, that are all natural, and homemade! :)

The proceeds from these scrubs will be benefiting The Pleven Project, to help better the lives of 92 children who are currently living in one of the worst orphanages.


I have used, and am still currently using one of these sugar scrubs.  I wanted to make one and try it out myself, before I sold them to others, I needed to make sure that 1) They actually worked and 2) That they were worth buying, let me tell you...I love it!  Now I'm not just saying this because it's "my creation" but because it truly is amazing!  I had never used a sugar scrubs before, but had heard many great things about them, so I gave it a try.  I use it after I shave (Sorry if that's too much information. ;) ) and because the coconut oil is a natural moisturizer my skin is literally so soft, and all the dry skin is gone!  The doTERRA Essential Oils also give a wonderful 100% natural scent which just make these scrubs all the better.   I also have extremely sensitive skin, and these do not irritate my skin at all!  That was an initial fear of mine, that I would have some horrible break out, but I gave it a try and was extremely pleased with the out come, no break out, and smooth skin! :)

The scrubs are all the same price at $5 a scrub (plus shipping if you are out of state), and you can pay using the donation button on this page: Hosea 14:3 | Scrubs  and if you are local you can use the donation button, or just pay with cash, either or. :)

These are the scents that I have made as of now:

Lavender Sugar Scrub

Lemon Sugar Scrub

Peppermint  Sugar Scrub

Lime Salt Scrub

Please comment below, or email me: AlyssaGoodhue@hotmail.com and let me know which scent you would like to purchase.  I have 12 empty jars, and am ready to make more scrubs, so please don't be shy! ;)

With Love,
Alyssa 

"Everyone Deserves To Be Happy"

"Well if they're happy then it's okay."

"As long as it makes them happy, I don't care"

"Everyone deserves to be happy."

A few months ago while Skyping with my best friend, and we got into a deep, warm and fuzzy, but also admitting our faults conversation, and Kaitlyn said something that I've not been able to let go of.  "This whole 'As long as they're happy they can do what they want' thing is dangerous." and if you actually think about it...She's right.   It's not always the right thing to do just because it makes us happy.  Using the "Well it makes me happy." is almost like trying to justify why, or convince yourself that it's okay just because you're happy.  But that is not the case.

It's so easy to fall into sin, and the majority of the time it feels good to sin.  We as humans, we crave the feeling we get while sinning, which is why the Bible tells us that daily we are going to have to fight the ways of the world, the temptations, and not give in.  Luke 9:23 tells us "And he said to all, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me." What does it mean to deny ourselves and take up our cross daily?  When Jesus took the cross and dragged it up the hill on His back, while wearing a crown of thorns, he hung there on that cross and paid for every wrong thing we will ever do.  So when we are told that in order to follow Jesus, we must take up our cross and deny ourselves, we are being asked to repent, to ask for forgiveness, and to recognize that we are nothing with out Christ.

There is a quote that I happened upon the other day that says "I refuse to entertain myself with the things that my God went to the cross for." it speaks so loudly, and has such a deep and true meaning behind it.  We often entertain ourselves with sinful choices, or actions, and we think nothing more than "Well it makes me happy."  but, what about God?  What about the man who wore that crown of thorns, hung on a cross, and still managed to say "Father forgive them." as He paid the price for MY sin.  What about that?

Happiness is important, but if your happiness if coming from things that break God's heart is it really worth it?

Mexico Trip | March 14th-20th, 2014 | Trip Of The Year

I'm ready to go back.  I enjoy being home, but I could literally pack, drive 6 hours,and do it all again.

These past few months the concept of love has been at the forefront of my mind.  What is love?  What does it mean to truly love someone?  How do you show love accurately?  A small, four letter word, that has such a large and important meaning.

But really, what does it mean to love? Unconditionally, without boundaries, expectations.  The college Bible study that I'm part of just finished going through a series by Andy Stanley, the main subject of the series was love.  Jesus gave us a *new* commandment right before He left earth "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you." (John 15:12 ESV)  To love as Jesus loved, is probably one of the most challenging tasks that we have been given.  He loved/loves unconditionally. Without boundaries. Without expectations.

As my understanding of love, and what it means to love, grows it was only fitting that I would venture to Mexico.  I've never experienced a truer form of love than what I experience when I spend time in Mexico.  Between the lives that we get to be a part of while we're down there, and the lives the we bring with us, the love of Christ is apparent, it's real, and it's tested, and pushed to it's limits daily.  Being able to maintain an attitude of love, compassion, and patience, while pouring concrete, shoveling rock, lifting bucks, hauling wheel barrows, and working the mixer, in the scorching heat isn't easy.  You are pushed to your limits, you're hot, sweaty, hungry, and tired, and honestly not in the mood to be *nice*.  Though the entire time we were at the work site doing those challenging tasks, I never once saw someone with an attitude of anything other than love.

Though the love didn't stop at the work site, it was spread through out the days, whether we were preparing for VBS, loading or unloading a trailer, hanging out, or even rooming with someone who wasn't the easiest to handle, love was there.

I know quite a few of the days that we were in Hermosillo, I wasn't feeling well I was taking medicine every four hours, and it wasn't helping as much as I wished it would have, and it was difficult for me to keep a loving attitude.   I found myself stopping to pray, and asking God to change my heart towards others, and reminding myself that I was there to serve.   Without fail, God changed my heart, and gave me the little boost I needed to keep my loving attitude going.

You would think that love would be easy on a missions trip, because after all you're going down to share God, and God is love.  But when you're waking up super early, and living out long days where bed time isn't till 11:00 and you only get 5 or 6 hours of sleep, for 4 days straight, it's not easy.  Not to mention traveling with a group of 51 people, things get tough, people bump shoulders, things don't always go as planned, and going somewhere takes 3 times as long as it should.

This was the biggest Youth/College Mexico Trip yet.  51 people, tons of new teenagers getting to see what a life changing, heart breaking, relationship growing, limit testing, best trip you could ever be a part of experience is like.  I have heard many of those people say that this was the best trip yet, and I'd have to agree.  I built new friendships, grew ones I already had, and was able to repair old friendships that had been broken for some time.  Mexico is great for that.  Building, growing, and fixing friendships.  What better atmosphere to do those things, than the Jesus loving atmosphere of  the Mexico trip.

With limited to no internet access, I had a lot of time to think.  Lots of things to work through in my mind, without the everyday distractions of life that was easy to do.  At times it got hard, and I wanted to come home, but pushing through and sticking it out was one of my better decisions.

So many inside jokes, and funny stories are now able to be told because of this trip.  I honestly (and people never believe me when I say this.) love the long car rides.  I would much rather ride in a car for hours on end, than ride in a plane for hours on end.  I love that riding in a car for 6+ hours forces you to talk to, and build friendships with the people in your vehicle.  I was able to build tons of friendships, create inside jokes, and just laugh at things that probably wouldn't be funny now, but were funny at the time cause we were tired.

I'm probably forgetting things, and there will probably be a part two of this post.  There was just so much that happened, and so many things that changed my heart.  Mexico trips are my favorite, and I look forward to going every year.  Mexico changes your heart, grows your heart, and ultimately captures your heart.  I know a large piece of me, and who I am is in Mexico.  I'm forever grateful for the adults who put together this trip, and are willing to work extra hours, stay up a little later at night, just to plan this trip, so our lives can be changed.  The adults who planned this trip, drove the vans, and just kept an eye on us, are one of the biggest blessings in my life.   I'm so lucky that these people were placed in my life, and I will be forever thankful for these trips.

Funded.

I'm taking a big breath and letting it out in a sigh of relief!  Because of wonderful people (a.k.a you lovely people!)  I am fully funded for my Mexico Missions Trip!    I am so thankful for generous hearts, and lovely people, who want to help me be where God has put my heart.   You don't realize how much your generosity and prayers mean to me, but there is no true way for me to put my thankfulness into words!

In 15 days I will climb into a van with my youth group, and ride along for the 6 hours drive, until we arrive in Hermosillo, Mexico.  Let me tell you, that thought excites my heart beyond measure!  I am so ready, so, so, ready for this trip, for the fellowship, for the time spent with God, I am ready!  

Thank you, for blessing be, for encouraging my heart, for allowing me to include you in my journey with God.  Thank you.

With love,
Alyssa

My Mexico

Mexico, just the thought of it makes my heart jump.  It's one of my favorite places to be, to go, to visit.

In March, when I go down, it will be my 6th time visiting/investing in the lives at Casa Esperanza Para Ninos, this is the orphanage that we work with while we are down there.  My church is such a huge blessing, and they are offsetting the cost by a large amount (I am not sure of the exact number.) which makes it easier for more of the youth/college students to be able to go.  We still have a *small* amount that each of us have to raise, to be able to go on the trip, that amount is $315.  I think you can see where this blog post is going, but I don't want my readers to feel like I am *always* asking for money.  So please, allow me to tell you about "my" Mexico.  Allow me to share some of my joy, my heart, with you, then I will let you be the judge of whether you would like to help me get to Mexico.

In March it will be my 3rd time going on the large youth trips, I have also been on three smaller trips with groups of 4 or 5 people. Each trip has so many different things to offer, but I think the bigger trips may be my favorite.

I have never been very good at making friends, if you put me in the same room as someone new a lot of awkward small talk will happen, and eventually one of us will just walk away.  It's terrible. The Youth Mexico Trip gives you no other option than to build relationships with those around you, and whether you're pouring concrete, putting up sheet rock, installing door handles, making balloon animals, or dressing up like a clown, there is no room/time for small talk.  You are put in situations where you have to communicate with people that you otherwise wouldn't talk to.  Friendships are built, and it's pretty much effortlessly done.  I have made many friendships, and still have many of those connections to this day!  It helps me, (as I'm sure it does many others.) step out of my comfort zone, and reach out to those who are around me on a weekly basis.

Comfort zone.  That is another area that this trip has benefited me, as I'm sure it has others.  I am not one to go out of my comfort zone, or to be the center of attention.  It makes me nervous, and uncomfortable, I prefer to not do things that force me to be in that position.  Well on a Mexico trip, you kinda have no option.  Whether you are dressing up like a clown (pictured below) or dancing to songs that you don't understand, you have to act silly.  My first year going down to Mexico, I decided to volunteer myself to be a clown for Vacation Bible School.  It was honestly one of the funnest things!  Yes, I looked absolutely ridiculous, but the kids loved it, and I had fun too!

Attractive right? ;) 

The kids are truly amazing.  I don't think I can accurately describe their purely splendid personalities, smiles, and giggles.  Each and everyone of them, so perfect and special in their own little ways.  Your heart is so greatly impacted by them. They don't have to try, they probably don't even realize that impact that they have had on the many teens who have gone down.  Their selfless love, constant smiles, always pulling and tugging at you for a hug, or just some attention. Honestly, they are just truly incredible.

God always, every single time, without fail, shows me just a little more of His heart...and I adore it.

I find it so much easier to focus on God, and God alone while in Hermosillo, because there is very limited (and sometimes no) internet access, no phone service, and just pure community, with the other believers around you.  God says "This is how it's supposed to be.  Loving the least of these. Serving Me.  Loving one another. Fellowship." it's always so apparent, and clear in my heart that God is there. every minute. in every room. in every church. every van. every VBS. everywhere.

Worship is one of my favorite things, but when in Hermosillo, it is one of my very favorite things.  I love that we sing worship songs, anytime, anywhere!  Whether it's around a campfire, singing in English and Spanish, in the hallways of our hotel, in the van, wherever we are we sing, and it's in those moments that I feel God move, more than ever.  It's just so innocent, we have a guitar, and our voices, we sing lyrics that we've memorized from our favorite worship songs, and it's just such a joy.

La Vid, is the church that Casa (the orphanage) runs.  We go there on Sunday morning while in Hermosillo, and although I have no clue what the pastor is saying, I love it.  I don't understand the message, but I love that their church body is so welcoming, and loving towards us.  They take the time to translate their worship songs for us (even though we are more than willing to sing in Spanish!), as well as do some songs in English.  Funny thing is, they have some worship songs that they will only sing in English because they say it sounds better. :)

I could write on for hours, (and maybe on another day I will.) but I have laundry to do, and a bathroom to clean.  I love Mexico. More than I could ever put into words, like I truly don't think it's possible to put my love for this place into words.

I have a little under 30 days to come up with $315 dollars.  God's got a plan, He's got a will, I know He will provide. Maybe He will use you to help me go to "my Mexico"?

So, I have a question for you.

Will you help me get to Mexico?

My Mexico Fund: 

 https://www.youcaring.com/mission-trip-fundraiser/mexico-missions-trip/126125

Be Consumed With Your Story

I've probably confused some of you (or all of you.) when I said I was going to Mexico, but just days before I had said that I was hoping to go to Uganda.   I apologize, for the confusion.  I have been uncertain of where God wants me...even though it's quite clear.   I did this last year too, you'd think that by now I would know where God wants me to be huh?  Well, it's easy to get consumed and distracted with our own wants/interests.  Which is why I'm writing this post.

A friend of mine wrote a post recently, called "Follow Your Arrow" talking about how we like to follow others lives.  How reading about someone who is on fire for God, doing missions work in a foreign country, might excite your heart and make you want to jump into that life, but it might not be where you are supposed to be.   I read Kisses From Katie this past year, and it made my heart excited for Africa, and I convinced myself, that Uganda was where I needed to be.  I "prayed" about it, but I wouldn't really consider it praying.  I asked God to send me to Africa, but I asked with my mind already made up.  I prayed with the answer I was looking for already in my head.   I decided that I would go to Uganda, Africa, and I would love orphans, the poor, the widow, and I would have this amazing story, people would be inspired by my works.  I was so consumed with Katie's story that I lost sight of where God has asked me to go.

A few months later I met a beautiful family that has spent bunches of time in Uganda, their daughter lives over in Uganda, and I wanted to live her life so.badly.  I saw the wonderful things she was doing and wanted to be in her shoes.

At this point my heart didn't want the country, my heart wanted to be in the spot light.  I had become so consumed that I forgot who's works, unconditional love, and beautiful heart needed to be in the spot light.

Being consumed by someone else's story, with the details, and wanting so much to be like them, can be dangerous.  We each have our own individual stories, with their own details, struggles, callings, and if we were all called to be missionaries in Uganda, Africa how would the rest of the world know Jesus?  We each have our own place, that we are called, and our hearts tugged towards...my heart, isn't called towards Africa, anymore than it's called towards China.

When I was 13 and God brought the orphan crisis into my life, when I became aware, there were 2 places on my heart, Mexico, and Bulgaria.  I never liked to admit it, which was silly, I was almost ashamed of my story because I wasn't venturing to Africa to minister in orphanages.  But without fail, every time I decide "Africa is where I need to be!" God says "Ya, I don't think so.  I need you in Hermosillo, Mexico and working to save my kids in Bulgaria."  He turns me around and reminds me that my heart ins't in Africa, and I don't think it ever will be.  I've tried to convince myself for years that I need to be there, but it was never a genuine feeling of content, love for that country.

In March it will have been 6 times that I have gone down to Hermosillo, Mexico every. single. time. I fall more in love, with the city, the kids, the language, it captivates my heart.  If I wouldn't have made my own decisions without consulting God, I would know Spanish by now.  It's a sad thought, but it's true.  If I would have followed the path that God paved for me, I would be so much more involved in the things that truly have my heart.

My struggles, and failures are a part of my story.  So I'm not entirely heart broken that I could know Spanish by now, or that I could be more involved in the areas that I truly adore.  Over the past year, while fighting God and where He is asking me to be, I've learned that Africa, is not for me.  God has beautiful, generous, inspiring people, that He is sending to Africa to be His hands and feet. As for me, He is sending me to Hermosillo, Mexico to be His hands and feet, He is sending me to advocate, and potentially show love to the kids in Bulgaria, that were abandon and have never been shown love.

So no, I am not going to Africa.  March 14th-20th I will be in Hermosillo, Mexico.  I will be helping build a new building, doing VBS with different churches around Hermosillo, and loving on some of the sweetest kids I know, and I would love it if you would play a part in getting me there.  $315 is how much the trip will cost.  But I am jobless.  I have no doubt that God will provide the money in some way, last year I had the money in 3 days...Yes, God is that awesome.  There is a donation button below where you can donate to help me with the small cost of my trip. Thank you, for continuing to support me, even though I'm not always sure where God wants me.

I recently posted this on my Facebook, it was short but go my point across. 

"Follow your story. Follow God. Follow YOUR path. Yes, you may read a book that excites your heart, and makes you want to jump into Katie Davis' life, but that doesn't mean it's where God wants you. If we all went to Africa to be like Katie, then who is gonna reach the rest of the world? Go. Be a "Katie". But be a "Katie" where God calls you to go. For some of you, it may be Africa, but others it may be Ukraine, or China, Bulgaria, or Mexico, or maybe God wants you to be a "Katie" in your hometown. Because you know what makes Katie's story so exciting, real and inspiring? (In my opinion.) Her faith, trust, and obedience when she FOLLOWED GOD. When He asked her to leave everything. Her family, her boyfriend, her friends, her comfy life in the US, to FOLLOW HIM.

Be like Katie, but be like her in her faith, obedience, and trust when God asks you to go to a foreign land, or to the soup kitchen in your town. I've seen so many people recently (Including myself in the past year.) get so, so, so consumed in others lives, in their stories, so much so that they forget to say "God...Where does my story lead? Where do you need me to be?" It's easy to look at others lives, their passions, their "callings" and get consumed, and even wish we had their lives...But what about the unique, inspiring story that God has planned out for you, and your life? I encourage you to seek God, find out where He needs you to go."

 God is asking me to go to Mexico, that is where my story leads.  So...Have you asked God where your story leads? 

 

Be Consumed With Your Story.

Consider helping me get to Mexico, to make a difference, and further share God's perfect love. 

With love,
Alyssa