$10,000

Today is sad, today hurts, today my girlie lost her family, and a family lost their daughter.  No, Della didn't die, she's still here, but Della's family couldn't continue with her adoption, I am unsure of the reason.  Her family is so sweet, they truly do love her, and I can only imagine the heart break, and aching pain they are feeling.  Will you pray for them? I love them so, and it hurts my heart that they are hurting.

Her sweet family, is offering $10,000 to anyone that is able to go and get "their" little girl.  That right there, just shows their love, for this little girl.  They just want her to be loved, and safe, can you do that for them?  Will you ease their pain just a little bit, by bringing Della home?  http://reecesrainbow.org/59418/della

The Grand Adventure: My Trip To Sofia, Bulgaria

Psalm 10:17-18
"O Lord, you hear the desire of the afflicted;
    You will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear
to do justice to the fatherless and the oppressed,
   so that man who is of the earth may strike terror no more."

Such a powerful and meaningful verse.  I can't help but think about the time spent in Bulgaria this past November, with the 3 kids who had just come out of an orphanage.  It was much different to see the kids, and watch them be brought out of the orphanage doors, than to just hear the stories and see the pictures.  Matthew, Jonathan, and Charity are such sweet kids, and it's truly heart breaking knowing that they have been tucked away their entire lives.

They all have so much personality, likes, dislikes, and also got to try so man new things once they were busted out of the orphanage.  It was something special, being able to watch them grow and learn so much in such a small amount of time. They truly blossomed.  Jonathan, had never seen outside of the orphanage, and man did he love it!   The wonder in his eyes, as we pushed them through the city of Sofia , was one of the most beautiful things.  He would swing his feet, as he sang till his heart was content, he would shriek with pure joy when he saw birds, he thought they were the best thing.   Oh that boys laugh, and his smile, he loved to be tickled!  If you stopped tickling him he would give you the most precious, precious, precious, puppy dog face until you tickled him again.   I very quickly fell in love with Jonathan.

I had never talked to, or been around someone who had Autism before.  I hear about autism all the time, and I have friends over the internet, who have kiddos with autism, so I'm slightly familiar with it.   Kids with autism have to have structure, and schedules, they like everything to be a certain way.  Well Miss Charity has Autism, along with a few other needs, and her world was completely flipped upside down.  I can only imagine how she felt, without things being the same day in and day out, as they had before.  She needed to get into some type of schedule.  But these "strangers" (her new wonderful mama, and papa!) came and got her, and took her to the other-side of the world, on an airplane with more and more people.  Charity's world got way too, big way too fast!  She had never been around large mounts of people before, so it was a little overwhelming for sweet girl.  But over all she did wonderfully and  little does she know that her life is going to be 1000x better than it was before!    It was beautiful to watch Charity, smile and giggle, she is very ticklish, and is cuter than ever!

Matthew, oh sweet, handsome, beautiful, cherished, loved, little Matthew.  This little boy, has had such a hard life, but he has managed to fight his way through and survive, it's like he knew that a family would come for him one day.  He has truly shown me that sometimes all we need is love, with in the few days that I spent with him, he flourished so much.  Seeing him start to talk, and react to us when we stroked his hair, or touched his face, it was beautiful.

Bulgaria, in and of it's self was interesting.  Very different from the US ( I didn't expect it to be like the US) they don't put ice in their drinks, and they don't usually eat food hot.   We walked all around Sofia, up and down the streets, in and out of stores, we even got to be 20 ft away from a protest (It was honestly awesome.) while at a convenient store.  We ate pizza while we were there, it was quite different, it had chicken, pickles, and corn on it...strange, but good!   Car rides were an adventure, I road in a taxi for the first time while in Bulgaria.  We went to a mall while we were there, before we picked the kids up, and compared to the "Large Hallway" that we have in Sierra Vista, it was huge.  4 or 5 floors high, SO many stores, we had Gelato at the mall, and it was fabulous!

Airports....Oh Airports.  Until this big adventure, I had never flown before,  I had never stepped foot on a plane.  Well that quickly changed, at first I enjoyed flying (once I got past the nerves!), but after so many flights, I was just ready to be done with it!  I think that if I was able to sleep in seats like that, it would have been better, but I can't even sleep in the car.  I did love take off and landing, I thought it was fun! ;)

Over all the trip was eye opening, and brought lots of different emotions.  Being away from my family for over a weak was extremely hard, jet lag, and time change were difficult, but I'm thankful that I was asked to go on this trip with the Unroe family.   I can now know, and understand a little more of what adoption is like, and that to me is just absolutely amazing.  I have seen a little more of the Fathers heart, my heart grew a size or two while in Bulgaria, I cannot wait to go back to Bulgaria, and see what God has in store for me. :)

I apologize if this post seems rather scrambled.  I've been writing it over the past month, many times I had to stop because I couldn't see through the tears of joy.  But I hope I was able to get the basic idea across.  I loved my trip to Bulgaria, and am so blessed to know the Unroe family, as well as meeting Jackie.  Such beautiful people that will forever have a place in my life. :)


With Love,
Alyssa

God Isn't A Genie

I feel like we all struggle with the way we view God, I feel like often times when we talk to Him, it's when we need something.  I myself, am guilty of this.  I find myself praying to God through out the day, not to thank Him, or just praise Him for being wonderful, but to constantly ask things of Him.    The way my mind views God, is something that has been at the front of my mind recently, and it's been something I have wanted to change for sometime now.

Today a beautiful friend of mine, was praying with me over my hurting heart, and something she said made me tear up, and think so differently of God.   She prayed and said "That you would be the hands over her ears protecting her from every nasty lie"  When I read that, I immediately pictured words, opinions, deceiving thoughts, lies from the enemy,  swirling through my head, at a constant and consistent pace, overwhelming me, making me shut down, and cry out in desperation, and God's hands placed over my ears, as peace, and comfort rushed over me.  It was such a revealing thought, and helped me understand a little more about the relationship God wants to have with us.

This may sound silly but, last night I went and saw Catching Fire (the new hunger games, if you haven't seen it then this may be a spoiler for you.) there is a seen where Katniss is trapped inside a force field, with a very large flock of Mockingbirds, that are mocking Katniss' little sister Prim screaming for help.  The birds are whizzing around her, repeatedly mimicking Prim, Katniss drops to the ground, hands over her ears and is screaming in utter terror.  On the outside of the force field is Peeta, yelling trying to tell Katniss "It's not real, clam down, you'll be okay, I'm right here, it'll end soon!"  He sat there and continually yelled trying to comfort her.

When life gets hard, or when we are constantly being told lies, and we try to deal with it on our own, God is right there on the other side of the force field, yelling, reaching out His hand, trying to help us, trying to rescue and comfort us.  If Katniss would have just turned and looked to Peeta, and listened to his words as he yelled them, it wouldn't have been as bad, if she would have known that it would end, and that it wasn't real, it would have helped ease the moment.   We are like Katniss, we break down, and cover our ears, we try so hard to deal with things on our own, because we view God as a person that is there to just give us things, not to help us, or redirect our paths, not as someone that truly wants whats best for us, and wants us to trust Him.

I feel that if we all viewed God as our best friend, we would have an easier time with hard trials.  If my best friend were to come to me, and warn me, or tell me that if I did a certain thing, or told me that something would harm me, I would trust her.  I wouldn't do what ever it was that she was warning me of.  So, why don't I respond to God the same way?  I have found myself in multiple situations where I can look back and see the warnings God gave me, or the multiple ways that He gave me to get out of certain situations.  He is right there yelling, "Don't do that, don't go that way, look at me, I have a better plan, I can help, I love you and want whats best!"  But I ignore Him, I realize further down the road, when I have given everything I have trying to fix something on my own, that if I would have listened to Him in the first place, I could have saved myself from so much hurt.  If I would have just trusted God, and grabbed the hand that was stretched out to me, I wouldn't have to go through these things alone.

The bottom line is, God isn't a Genie, He isn't here to answer our wishes and make our lives perfect.  He is here because He loves us, and wants to rescue us in the hard times, He wants to have a relationship with us, He wants to be the best friend that we listen to, and tell everything to.  Not just the friend that is convenient to have around, because they give you things.  He want us, all of us, the good and the bad.

He wants you and I to praise Him, when life is good, and when life sucks, when things are going our way, and when the entire world is against us, and we feel like we have nothing more to give.  He wants to rescue us, and show us the better way to do things.

I guess what I'm trying to convey is that God, is here with you and me, day in and day out He never leaves.  What my friend said, made me think of God in a way that changed my view, it made me picture God, not as someone that I pray to who I can't see, but as a protector.  I literally pictured my self on the ground, hands over my ears, screaming in utter terror, because of lies, opinions, and pain, that surrounded me, as these mighty but gentle hands reached down and covered my ears.  It got silent, the words, and thoughts stopped, and God just hugged me.  He reminded me that it would be okay, that one day we would all be rewarded for our faithfulness to Him, and that one day those words, and opinions, would stop and that there would be pure joy, in Heaven.   I have honestly never had a more comforting thought, than the one I had today.  But I am thankful that I had it.

Reece's Rainbow Waiting Child: Dawn #17-1

I have a post that I am working on, it's all about my trip to Bulgaria, but it is going to take me a while to write.  There is so much to write about, I don't want to forget anything, so I have been writing a little bit each morning.   Although that is not what I came here to write about, I want to share a sweet princess with you, one who has waited for a long while, and deserves a post all about her.

She has waited 13 years, for a family to choose her.  At the age of three she was transferred from the orphanage to a mental institution, and that is where she has spent the last 10 years of her life.  Toys that play music are her favorite, and she loves attention.   Her smile is contagious, and her name is Dawn.  She is full of potential, and would blossom in a family.

She looks like the sweetest little girl, who has friends to make, and places to be.  I bet she would love to have lots of siblings, and have a big dinner with a family.  I  also bet that she would love to snuggle on the couch, and watch movies with with a family of her very own.  You see Dawn, has never had anyone believe in her, no one has ever looked passed her diagnosis and seen her potential.  She has always been shoved to the side and tucked away, because to the world she "wont ever contribute to society"  and we both know that is far from true.  We both know, that sweet, smiley, girl above has more to offer than she has been given credit for.  It just takes the right person, the right family, and a lot of love to help her reach her full potential.

Dawn's Reece's Rainbow Profile: http://reecesrainbow.org/4398/dawn-17-1

Angel Tree, Angel Tree, ANGEL TREE!!

For those of you that read my posts you probably remember this post about Angel Tree!  At that time I was a warrior for a little cutie named Lark, well Lark found her family, and I had to pick a new little one!  I also made this post about my new child, and I never actually told you all who I was a new warrior for!  Now it's officially Angel Tree time, and I have the goal of raising $1000 before December 31st for my Angel Boy! So I have decided to write this post and introduce my new Angel Tree child!

George (For some reason I just find that to be the most adorable name.) is 9 years old, and lives in an orphanage in Eastern Europe.  He was born with Down syndrome, he can walk with support, and loves to play with toys!  He is described as friendly and has a positive attitude, he has opportunities to play games and other activities but he does not always participate. He is the sweetest little Angel Boy and is not aggressive towards himself or others.  This Christmas season I am determined to find him a family, and raise $1,000 for him!

I am so blessed and thankful that I get to be George's Angel Tree Warrior this Christmas!  I chose George for two reasons, one I come from a family full of boys.  I have 7 younger brothers and 2 older brothers, so I know how little boys act, and how they love to build Legos, play out side, and play the video game.  I am able to connect with little boys like George so much easier because I have so many brothers.  It breaks my heart to think about one of my little brothers being in George's situation, that terrifying thought gives me the drive to save George!

Reason number two for why I chose George, I will be going on a trip to his country in just a few weeks.  I will get to see the inside of an orphanage, and see just how horribly these kids are forced to live.  I will be able to see just a little more of what George's life is like, and that too will help me grow a strong bond to this sweet child who has no one.

So this Christmas season I hope you will consider donating to George's Angel Tree fund, and share his picture in hopes that a family will rescue him.  Lets make this Georges last Christmas alone!  Who's with me?

If you donate $35 or more to George's Angel Tree fund you will be sent an ornament with George's photo on it, to hang on your Christmas Tree! :)  Here is a link to George's profile: http://reecesrainbow.org/53858/george192

Send Me Out

This past weekend I went on a wonderful adventure, to visit some very loved "family" in Hermosillo, Mexico.  I have been down to Casa Esperanza Para Ninos, 5 times now and ever time I go down I fall even more in love with the kids. (For those of you that haven't been following my blog, Casa Epseranza Para Ninos is an orphanage in Hermosillo, Mexico that my church works with.) I love the culture, the people, the language, it just has captured my heart!

I spent 3 days down there, and it just wasn't enough time for me.  I've been back for 4 days and I am already longing to go back.  But alas I'm not sure when I will get to go back. (I'll expand a little more on that in a different post.) So I soaked up all the snuggles, hugs, and smiles that I could while I was down there.  

 While we were down in Hermosillo, we helped finish up the new house that has been built.  That house once it's finished will be able to house 15 more orphans.  How cool is that?  We put on door handles, we swept, and we helped put up bird board.  One of the many reasons why I enjoy going down to Mexico, is that I always learn something new.  This passed weekend when we went down I learned how to install door hardware.  Yes, that seems like a small and silly task, but now it's just another skill that I've acquired.  

One of the nights we all gathered around a huge bonfire, side by side, in Spanish as well as English and worshiped.  We worshiped the same God, in our own languages and we even worshiped in each others languages.  That is one of my favorite times.  I think it's absolutely amazing that although we can't communicate through words because of the language barrier, we can all worship the same God, and give thanks for those times when we get to see a little more of His heart.

We spent our Saturday at the beach with the Casa kids.  We spent hours swimming, eating delicious Pollo (Chicken) and just having a beautiful time.  I must say that every time I go to Mexico, and we go to the beach, the song "How He Loves" always gets stuck in my head.  I stand and I look around me, I see the kids, and massive ocean and I just think of how God's grace is like an ocean, I think about how much I am loved by a God that is too big to describe. I start to realize just how small I am, how compared to the size of the oceans, or the different countries, or even to the universe, I am a small speck.  A small speck, that the creator of the earth chooses to care about, and love so much that He sent his son to be beaten, and hated, given a crown of thorns, and ultimately killed so that  could have my sins washed away.  So that I could live and have opportunities like Mexico, so that I could love these kids just like God loves me.  I am awestruck at God's love for little old me.

Every time I go to Mexico I come back with a new understanding of God's love, and He always allows me to see just a little more of His heart.  For that I am thankful, I'm just so thankful that I have this understanding of God's love (Although I don't fully understand, because His sacrifice was so great.) that helps me love and serve others as He did.  His son came and served us, so that we had an example of how we should serve others.  Even though I'm not always the best at it, I want nothing more in life then to be directly in the middle of God's will for my life, even if it means being uncomfortable.  So here I AM send ME.

Happy Day!

Today is a good day. 

For many reasons, but mainly for a very wonderful reason. 

My Angel Tree Baby?  

Miss Lark?  

She has a....

FAMILY!!!!  

Yes, a family!!  

I'm so overjoyed, and excited for her to be rescued! 

As for me and Angel Tree?  

Well I have requested a new Angel Tree child!  

I will announce the child, when it's official! :) 

A Plea For A Family

Two sweet sisters, ages 5, and 6 waiting to be chosen.

Both sisters, sweet and precious.

One with a mental delay, and the other with Down syndrome.

They would make wonderful daughters.

But their story gets sad.  They were separated. 

One in an orphanage, and the other in an adult mental institution. 

They don't know what is happening. 

The big sister is so worried, she has no idea where her little sister was taken. 

Their profile states: " But one day her sister was taken away from her to go to the mental institution. She has been looking for her the whole day and cried hard when she was told her sister had to leave. " 

This is not right in anyway.  

They are sisters and they belong together, in a family. 

Not apart in an orphanage, and mental institution.  

Please, oh please, someone step up and reunite these sisters. 

Please. 

http://reecesrainbow.org/67079/merry-margaret

Why?

**Note: There are photos of Addison in this post.  They may be hard for some to process. Just a warning.**

This month has been an extremely hard month. 

It comes in at a close second to the month we lost Addison. 

So much has gone on in life, and my heart is so worn out. 

I feel as if I have been stretched and used in ways, like never before. 

September is always a difficult month. 

But it is also a happy one too. 

Two years ago today we lost Addison Ruth. 

She was still born, and beautiful. 

The heart break that came with loosing her was horrendous. 

Today we grieve and celebrate what would have been her 2nd birthday. 

We miss this little girl, more than we could ever express. 

It's hard and honestly I just wish Addison was here with us. 

Because the pain is just too much. 

Although if Addison hadn't been taken home to heaven...

We wouldn't have Oliver. 

Oh what a precious gift Oliver is. 

A gift straight from heaven for sure.

His birthday is in September too, and what a wonderful that is. 

I don't think I will ever be able to thank God enough for Oliver. 

But I still wish we could have had Oliver and Addison here with us. 

She would have been 2 today... 

She would have been walking, talking...

Having opinions on food, and tv shows. 

She should be running around in pretty dresses and bows in her hair.

She should be here with her mom, and dad...

big brothers and big sisters.... 

She should be here. 

But I guess God had different plans for our family. 

Just like God had different plans for Kyle. 

Kyle was a sweet little boy, who had no family. 

He had no home,  no toys, no bed, nothing to his name. 

He was given up when he was a baby for reasons that we will never know.  

He was born with Down syndrome, and spent his life in an orphanage. 

He was transferred to an adult mental institution at the age of 5. 

Where he sat and waited to be chosen. 

He was chosen by a wonderful woman, but sadly Putin passed a law. 

A law that would ban Americans from adopting R*ssian orphans. 

Putin decided not only Kyle's fate, but all the orphans in R*ssia. 

Kyle and all the other children have no more hope. 

They no longer have a second chance at life. 

They have been hidden away from the world, because no one sees their potential. 

The ban has been in place for about 10 months now.  

The longer the ban is there, kids start to die. 

About a month ago we got an updated photo of Kyle. 

When I heard this news I got excited because I wanted to know how my boy was doing. 

I anxiously opened the message with his photo, I didn't find what I had hoped. 

I didn't find a sweet picture of Kyle, that told me he was doing okay. 

I found a sad, and terribly heart breaking picture, that said Kyle needed out. 

Yes...That is the same little boy. 

Heart breaking.  

Kyle was slowly wasting away because he wasn't viewed as valuable. 

No one cared about Kyle, no one took the time to think about his future. 

Because of the ignorance in this world.... 

On September 25th, 2013 we got the news that Kyle had passed away. 

He was no longer in pain here on earth, but is now dancing in heaven pain free. 

No it's not a "happy ending", yes Kyle is pain free and in the arms of Jesus. 

But we failed, we failed as the body of Christ, and just humans in general.  

We failed. 

This life passed away so quietly, and went un-noticed for so long. 

Kyle was listed on a very big photo listing for the majority of his life. 

But yet he died alone. 

Please tell me why we ignored him?  Why didn't we fight for this life? 

Why didn't we care enough to do something?  

WHY?

This should never happen!  But the reality is, that it does.... 

Every day another kid dies.

But people continue to ignore these lives. 

They don't do anything. 

You don't have to adopt to make a difference. 

Pray. Share. Donate. Advocate. 

There are endless things that we can do to stop this! 

You could help fund a family who is adopting: 

-The Tanquary Family is adopting Kaydee-

http://reecesrainbow.org/48712/sponsortanquary

They need $4800 to be fully funded. 

-The Williams Family Adopting Berkley- 

 www.reecesrainbow.org/61131/sponsorwilliams 

They need $5500 to be fully funded.

Oh how about helping and Angel Tree warrior raise $1000 for their Angel Tree child!  

The bigger fund that a child has, the more likely they are to be adopted! 

You could donate to a child's fund! 

-Lark-

http://reecesrainbow.org/65306/lark-l

-Mick- 

http://reecesrainbow.org/65306/lark-l

-Hale-

http://reecesrainbow.org/65890/hale

I beg of you to just get up and do something!  

We cannot continue to let this happen!

These lives are precious, and they  have value. 

They have potential and they are children!  

So pelase, oh please, oh please! 

Get up. and GO.  Find a child or a family, or an organization!  

Do something! 

For these kids.... 

It's A Do Over

"Joy comes in the morning." Psalm 30:5

I've read this verse many times before, but never did it click in my mind what exactly this verse meant.
Life can sometimes be stressful, or disappointing, upsetting, or angering, when I say sometimes I mean a lot of the time.  Things don't go our way, or someone says something that upsets, or hurts us, and we let the emotions for those negative moments consume us.  We allow those few moments to determine our attitude, our actions, and how the rest of our day will be.  But ultimately it doesn't stop there, we carry those emotions with us and we let them determine our  tomorrows.

We aren't promised our tomorrows, life is short, way to short to let something that happened yesterday, ruin our tomorrows.  "Joy comes in the morning" Psalm 30:5   When you wake up each morning, it's a do over.  It's a new day to fix broken relationships, send apologies, to choose a positive and joyful attitude.  It's a new day to let go of what happened yesterday, because you can't do anything about what has already happened, and to make the decision that you will strive to make your tomorrows better than your yesterdays.

Tomorrow, when you wake up...let the joy come and fill your heart!  Make the decision to have an attitude of love and a mind positive thoughts!

Songbirds and Angel Tree

Hello lovely people!

I'm not sure if I have blogged about Angel Tree in the past years, but it's a wonderful opportunity for others to give a gift that will be used in ways you never thought possible!

Angel Tree is a yearly project that Reece's Rainbow holds. It runs from November 1st - December 31st.   You sign up to help a child, of your choice that is listed on their site, and it is your goal to not only raise $1,000 for the child, but also find them a forever family!

Now if you don't know what Reece's Rainbow is check out their site!  I'll go ahead and give you a brief summary now though.  Reece's Rainbow is a certified 501(c)3 non-profit organization.  They raise awareness as well as help find families for orphans with Down syndrome, and other special needs in other countries. :) Beautiful ministry, formed of beautiful people!

I have done Angel Tree 3 years in a row, and I love it more and more each year!  It's such a great thing for the children, because they have a dedicated advocate, and they get tons of publicity, in hopes that their mama, and papa will see them!  I just think it's brilliant!

This year I am an Angel Tree warrior for a sweet songbird named Lark.  Lark will be 3 years old in November, she was diagnosed with Down syndrome, and has the sweetest grin.

Here is an update on Lark from May 2013:
"Lark is wearing a hearing aid, is well reacting to the sounds in the environment, "sings" when she hears music.  Stands with help or needs to hold her hand, walks with some help, started to try to put the pyramid rings - sometimes needs help in this activity .  Very much interested in other children especially when the play around, started to repeat the movements - pushes the car, takes the toy, claps her hands.  Learned to eat cookies holding in her hand.  Drinks from a cup which is held by an adult."

Precious right?

Well I'm the lucky girl that gets to share her priceless grin, find her a forever family, and raise $1,000 for her! I take such pride in this opportunity!   I have been thinking of fund raisers that I can do to help me raise this $1,000 for Lark.  But I need some new ideas!  If you have any I would love to hear them! ;)

Any who,  I wanted to propose the opportunity to you all, if you are looking for a way to give this Christmas but aren't sure where to put your money, I would suggest Lark's grant!   Children have a better chance at finding families if there are larger amounts of money in their grants!  Adoption is expensive, and you can help with the cost! :)

You're donation of $5, $10, or $20 would help me reach my goal, and help Lark find her family!  There is a donation button on the left hand side of the blog that is labeled 'Angel Tree For Lark'  if you feel led to donate please do so through that button!  :)   I will also have a tab at the top of the blob labeled 'Shop', where I will have some Lanyards and Key Fobs for sale!  All proceeds will be donated to Larks Angel Tree fund!  :)   So take another look at this precious grin and consider helping Lark find her family this Christmas!

Your Heart Has To Be Right

Missions trips are fun, and exciting, they are eye opening and life changing, they inspire you, and they break your heart in ways you never thought possible.   But ultimately none of that matters if your heart isn't in the right place.  You can't go into the missions field, and be focused on yourself or your issues, or who said what.  Because when you enter the missions field, life automatically becomes about everyone else, your problems get set aside for the time being.  Life becomes about serving, and bettering the lives of others.

You see I would love to venture over to Africa at some point in my life, I truly would!  But right now I don't feel it's where God wants me.  When I jumped into the thought of Africa, I did it with the wrong heart. I had just gotten back from a missions trip to Mexico with my youth group that hadn't gone to well.  I convinced my self that since that one trip to Mexico didn't go well that, that was not where God wanted me.  Which wasn't the case at all.  I told myself that God wanted me Africa, and I tried to find all the reasons why I knew this was right.  But ultimately things with my health just didn't add up, neither did the money situation. I knew that this wasn't where God wanted me but I refused to acknowledge that.  I continued to pray and ask God to show me that it was right, and He continued to turn my heart back to Mexico.  He continued to remind me of just how in love I am with the language, people, food, the kids, and just the country in general.  I knew where God needed me but it took me a while to realize that.

When I went to Mexico in March, I had the wrong heart.  There were issues going on between myself and others that I let consume my heart and attention.  Because I let myself become consumed with those issues, I wasn't able to give my all  and serve those people, the churches, the kids at the orphanage, and the ones at VBS.  I realize now my  mistakes and my faults, and that I let myself get consumed and forgot the reason that I was down there.  God has since renewed my heart, as well as my mind.  He has shown me clearly where I am needed, and has re-lit the fire in my heart, for the country of Mexico that had gone dim.  

So please, oh please make sure your heart is in the right place before you jump into the missions field.  Because if we aren't 110%  focused on the people God has sent us to witness to and benefit, those people will be neglected.  They wont experience the unconditional and wonderful love of Christ.  We can't give our all if we are concerned with, and focused on ourselves.

Change Of Plans, And Content Heart

Some concerns have come up recently, and I have made the decision along with talking to my dad that Africa is not a wise choice at this time.  My mom believes that the reason none of these other missions trips are working out is because God wants me in Hermosillo.  Which I have been praying about, and since praying about it my heart has felt this constant ache for the people and the country of Mexico.   I'm in love with the language and the little tan faces, I don't think I can stay away from them!   I will be spending my time write now, finishing up learning Spanish and I will be going back down to Mexico sometime here in the next few months.  Thank you to those of you that generously donated to my Uganda Fund.  I plan to use that money for future missions trips to Heromsillo.  But for those of you that would like me to do so, I will refund your money.  

Thank you again, and please join me on this journey to be God's hands and feet.

I'm ready to go back. 

Silent

Meek:
Quiet, gentle, and easily imposed on; Submissive."

Humble:
"Having or showing a modest or low estimate of one's own importance."

These two words have popped up quite a bit recently.  I sit and ponder their definitions, and what God is trying to communicate.  

I've seen and heard people say "When you are silent you learn more."  which never really made sense to me until recently.  If we are constantly, and continually speaking about "my happiness, my life, my wants, my needs, my anger."   We have no time to listen to and put others first. Because we are so concerned with ourselves.   We are so concerned with making our lives perfect, and fulfilling out wants, needs, and desires that we miss so much.   We can't tend to the needs of others, and do the work of our creator if we are so self absorbed.  For most of us and maybe even all of us...it's not a conscious decision because we have become to used to the thought of  "It's me first, when I'm happy and my life is perfect then I will focus on others."  Yes, this is our natural human instinct.  But we aren't supposed to give in to that, we're supposed to fight it.  We are in this world, not of it.  We can't stand out, and be set apart in Christ if we are just like everyone else.  If we are too busy worrying about ourselves, and what we need and want....We will miss everything.  We will blend in with the rest of the crowd.  We will be just like....everyone else.

When you are truly living in and for Christ, people can tell.  Trust me.  There have been times in my life when people, and not just any people...but people that don't believe in my savior.  They come to me and say "I don't get it you love these people, you love these kids that you've never met, and you get nothing from it but yet you are so happy and willing.  Why?"   Those comments and words show me that I'm doing something write.   A quote from Francis Chan that I found recently made so much sense it says "Something is wrong if our lives make sense to unbelievers."  and he's right.  If people who live in the world, can understand and comprehend my life, then I'm not where I should be.    I can tell when I'm not where I should be and when my life makes all too much sense to those who don't believe, because those comments I told you about?  They stop coming, people stop asking me to pray for them...I blend in and I'm just living life like everyone else.  Not with a purpose, not to reach out to others, but for myself.  All for me, and that is not where God want's any of us to be.    Put yourself last, Others second and God first.

103

103 days till I leave for Africa.

103 Days till my life will be changed.

103 days till I will grow even closer to God then ever before. 

103 Days till God breaks my heart for what breaks His...

...Even more than before. 

I decided to count tonight and see just how many days till I leave. 

103 Days.

Although I will only be gone for a week...

It will be a week that will change my life...

forever.

Wonderful & Willing Hearts

Little by little money is trickling in.

Wonderful people are contributing to my trip, so that I can be His hands and feet.

I'm so excited to have this opportunity!  

I'm so thankful for all the wonderful and willing hearts, that are helping me get there! 

Right when I start to worry about money, God provides.  

Just as I knew he would. 

"Cast all your worries on Him, for He cares for you." 

1Peter 5:7 

He knows what He's doing, and I trust Him. 

Shine.

I was going to write an elaborate post about, my Africa trip. 

 I was going to explain my excitement, but I tried and failed.  

So instead, I wrote this.  

To ask if you all would pray, share, and donate if you feel led.  

As of right now I will need a miracle to get the money I need for this trip.  

I'm not totally freaking out yet, but I wonder if I should be?  

I know God has this trip, and my life in His hands.  

Thank you, loves.

Found this on Pinterest. 

Today...Is A Joyous Day!

February 9th, 2011 a sweet girl caught my eye. 

Her name was Maya, and she had just arrived at New Day Foster Home in Beijing. 

They post this picture of her, and I instantly fell in love, from that day I prayed for her...Nonstop.

This little girl so fragile and sweet. 

The plan at the time, was they were going to nurse her back to health..

...so she was strong enough to have surgery.

She would then have her ENT surgery to fix her lip. 

Then next the plan was to find her a family. 

She was so sweet, and had the BEST smile. 

I shared any photo that they posted of her, I shared the updates, and silly things she did. 

I wished more than anything that she would be mine. 

I loved her so much. 

On May 20th, 2011 we recieved a not so pleasent update. 

One that actually broke my heart, and hurt so much. 

Maya....Had been diagnosed with a Wilms tumor.

Maya...had cancer. 

My friend had messaged me share this news.

Through out the months I was constantly getting in contact with her caretakers. 

I needed to know how she was doing. 

And surprisingly enough...Maya took those Chemo treatments as great as is humanly possible while fighting cancer.  

Every time they shared a picture or update, they always said she was "All Smiles!" 

My little super girl.  It was always good to hear those nice updates.

They made me smile. 

She fought that battle with cancer for almost exactly a year...

But today my friends... Is a joyous day! 

Why, you might ask? 

Because Maya was announced.....

CANCER FREE! 

Maya says that something to shout about, and I honestly agree with her! 

Praise the Lord, this little princess is on her way to a new life! 

Winners!

Hello there dear friends,

I drew the winners of the earrings...

I have the winners name right here in front of me...

...but before I announce the winner, I wanted to thank you all! 

For sharing my blog, my posts, and my new adventure to Nyada village, in Uganda, Africa!

Yes, I still need quite a bit more money, but I still have time...

...Not to mention the awesome God that provides.  

If it's His will I will get there one way or another.

Through the belly of the whale, or walking on the path that He has paved for me.

I will get there! 

Now on to the winner...

Our lucky, and oh so gorgeous winner is....

Genesis H.!!!! 

I adore this sweet young lady, and think of her as family!

Thank you Genesis, for you donation and wonderful heart! 

Love you girlie!